A Total Waste of Makeup

Can you hear that? That's the sound of gnashing and wailing by Harry Potter fans worldwide.

Last night, as my BFF were hanging out, I got on the computer to check my trusty Bloglines. I clicked on the Entertainment Weekly Hollywood Insider Blog and saw the startling headline: NEWS FLASH: 'Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince' Bumped to Summer 2009. Like the Potter-phile that I am I said no, no, no like a crazy person hoping it was a joke. Alas, it was not.

Wanna know why? Here's what the press release says:

“[L]ike every other studio, we are still feeling the repercussions of the writers’ strike, which impacted the readiness of scripts for other films—changing the competitive landscape for 2009 and offering new windows of opportunity that we wanted to take advantage of. We agreed the best strategy was to move Half-Blood Prince to July, where it perfectly fills the gap for a major tent pole release for mid-summer.”

Translation: Warner Brothers has made enough money this year thanks to the overwhelming success of the Dark Knight and would rather spread the wealth.

I'm sorry, but is there such as a thing as making TOO MUCH money in one year? Would it really hurt them that much in 2009 to have only one potential blockbuster in Terminator 4: Salvation? I can hear studio execs' hearts stopping with that blasphemy. I know that Hollywood revolves around the almighty dollar. I do. However, this seems pretty low even to my cynical senses.

People are PISSED, to say the least. A petition has been championed (over 10,000 signatures at 2 pm): http://www.petitionspot.com/petitions/harrypotter6. From the comments section of the Hollywood Insider post breaking the bad news:

This is more than agravating! But let us not just complain on these comment sites. LET YOUR VOICES BE HEARD! I am asking everyone to send an email to Warner Bros Feature Film department and Rattle Alan F. Horn the guy responsible for pushing the film to next year.

My 8 year old daughter actually cried when we told her this movie wasn't coming out until next summer instead of the fall. She has been looking forward to this for a year!

This is the worst movie news I've heard in a long time. Way to get more people to see the movie. Now no one will go.

BOYCOTT ALL WB MOVIES. . .AND IF YOU HAVE SEEN THE DARK DONT WATCH IT AGAIN...HIT THEM WERE IT HURTS. . .THE POCKET!

THIS IS RIDICULOUS!!! I was getting so excited that I only had to wait 3 more months for the movie but NOW I have to wait 11!!! Harry Potter has almost always come out in November around my birthday. I AM OUTRAGED!!!!!!!!!

That's just a taste. While I think it's pretty shitty of the studio to do, there are still a few problems with the outrage and the proposed "solutions":

1. Warner Brothers, much less Alan Horn (does anyone else think of the actor from Entourage when you hear that name?), doesn't give a shit what movie audiences want, when it comes right down to it. They know they have gold on their hands and people will see it no matter what. I mean really. People who are going nuts over this will NOT boycott the movie. They're nuts BECAUSE they love it so much...so they're going to boycott? Yeah, it doesn't work like that.

2. How many people who go to the movies really know what studio is releasing what? Unless you read the trade mags, the trade mag for Dummies like EW, etc? Go out on the street right now and ask 100 people what studio put out The Dark Knight and you'll get at least 80 people without any idea, they just go to the movies and don't realize when you see the screenshot of a studio lot shimmer, it's going to morph into the Warner Brothers logo.

3. We don't live in the golden era of the cinema anymore. See number one - the studios don't give a rat's ass who they piss off because they have something people will always want: entertainment. Anyone remember the writer's strike?

4. Harry Potter fans aren't doing themselves any favors by posting some of this comment drivel.

Slightly unrelated, some moron also posted that maybe WB is scared that Twilight will outperform HP two weeks later...um, no. I loves me my Twilight as we all know, but we aren't even in the same species here folks (no pun intended). Some Twilighters already make themselves look ridiculous, so don't make it worse for yourselves, mmkay?

Like I said, this news pisses me off too because I was absolutely looking forward to the new movie, like I always do since I'm a card carrying member of the HP and movie clubs. I also wonder what it means to the people who busted their asses to get this movie ready for a November 2008 release, which I think is very uncool. I hate that Warners can do this. My not-so-cynical-side would love to see such a huge stink created over this that WB would have to backtrack, but again - they don't have to. People are going to see it anyway. The percentage of "business" they'll lose from this will be very small, which is unfortunate, but true. Even if I were to be one of the boycotters, I couldn't give up my EW (owned by Time Warner). It's not as simple as saying, "I won't see this movie."

I did just read that Warners pissed off the wrong dork by pressuring Harry Knowles of Ain't it Cool to remove bad reviews of the new Star Wars animated movie. And now they've pissed off Harry Potter fans. I'd love to see them have to eat their hats, but I'm not holding my breath.

Eff you, Alan Horn and Warner Brothers. This dork writing this blog has a more boring November to not look forward to. But now I have more time to re-read the series for the 4th time.